The Crosswalk

Awesome!! We complain about the cross we bear but don't realize it is preparing us for the dip in the road that God can see and we cannot.


Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle!

A Night at the Theatre

So today was a good day and great night. I had my review at work today. I've been with the company a year and a week now. I was nervous because I know I haven't performed to the top of my ability and there are others there that far outshine my abilities in the Dot Net realm.

Well, Ryan had nothing but wonderful things to say. He started with my attitude saying it was very uplifting and that I should keep that up. We talked about a lot of things and I began to relax and enjoy the review when I realized I had just been taking it all too seriously and wasn't enjoying it. Then it just started to fall into place. That's when he told me about my raise. I won't go into details but suffice to say that I am not at all displeased with it! It was wonderful news!

When I got home, Sadao began to ask me about the new guy he had over last night... what I thought about him and how I felt, etc. I won't say it wasn't difficult to discuss. It was. Sadao and I have been very close and for him to say just a few days ago that he misses the personal intimacy (not physical) that we used to share... and then begin to pour that energy into someone else is very disheartening. I think I understand how others in my past have felt about it too with me in Sadao's place. I am learning... not in the way I'd like but... if you don't learn something one way, you learn it another, that's for sure.

Anyway, I told him that it really didn't matter what I thought and that it was up to him. I just hope their time together is good. However long it may last, whether it be a few days or the rest of their lives, I want him to be happy, more than anything else.

I helped him with a hair project he's working on and then got ready for my first play at the Barn Theatre. It was wonderful. It's called "The Boys Next Door." It's about a man who acts as a counselor for four mentally handicapped men living in an assisted living facility. The characters were so well played. It was funny at times and heartwrenching at other times. I really enjoyed it! I know I'm going to enjoy volunteering there and, if luck has it, performing there some day too.

So, now I'm at home, alone waiting on the boys to return with Dorian. He's flying in tonight from his trip out west. It will be good to see him and to hear about his travels. Right now, I'm a little peckish, so I'm going to grab a bite and wait for MY group of mentally challenged men to come home.

Peace,
Jenna

It's Springtime for Hitler and Germany!

Yes, spring is springing in my life, it seems. I'm happy for that. A lot has been going on lately and this week is no exception. The last time I wrote was March 27th. Much has happened since then! I was mistaken on the Pride event we went to... it was actually the Pride of the Palm Beaches... not the Treasure Coast pride, that's this weekend.

The event was great! The parade wasn't until Sunday even though the website said Saturday... so Sadao got to go and see the parade on Sunday after all... which was great. On top of that, Twink and Cesar came down Saturday night, spent the night with us and went to Pridefest with us! It was great, although I'm not sure that Cesar had as a good a time as the rest of us. :) Not exactly his scene, ya know. :)

The house hasn't sold yet... apparently the bank needed more time so the closing date was changed to April 30th. So... not too much longer to wait now. I just hope this finally goes through. It's not so much the money, I've been concerned about the real property involved. It's been bugging me for a long time now. I just want to make sure someone has the property who will take good care of it since I really can't. Once that has been lifted, I don't mind going into financial restructuring to repay the remaining debt I have and get things right in my money-life again.

Things are on a more even-keel between Sadao and I again. There's so much presumption and assumption going on that it drives me bat-shit crazy at times. He told me the other day that he looked up the definition of the word "intimacy" and felt he had to apologize to me. He was thinking physical intimacy and I wasn't. Once he understood that, he realized that he too misses the intimacy we once had. I was glad to hear that! Hopefully things will continue to get better in that arena.

In other news, I am now an official volunteer at The Barn theatre in Stuart, FL! Tuesday night I'll be attending the show "The Boys Next Door" at the "Friends and Family" night. It's free to all volunteers. I'll also get to meet the people I'll be working with. Thursday I'm working in snack bar and on the 24th, I'll be an usher. I also get to try-out for the shows now! I'm excited about this as it, hopefully, represents new opportunities for me!

Later this week, we'll have friends staying with us and this weeked is Pride in Miami Beach and Pride of the Treasure Coast here in Port St. Lucie. So, this will be a busy week!!

Last week was our (not-so) "annual" mini-golf tournament here at the office. I sponsored hole 14 and turned it into a disco. I got second prize for hole design! First place certainly deserved it... QA converted their entire office into a Spongebob Squarepants wonderland! It was awesome!

Anyway, I have lots to do today and I'm goofing off here. Just wanted to post something to keep my memories intact.

Peace,
Jenna