War, good God y'all.

It seems I was wrong about something.  I've always said that the way to stop war is for one side to stop fighting, forcing the end of the war.  Within the strictest guidelines of terminology, that is true since one definition of war is a state of being between two or more entities.  But even without the war it appears that hostilities remain. Sometimes they stronger than ever since the war, at least, assuaged the hostilities.

So I won't try to stop war anymore.  Ceasing hostilities is more noble goal... but also a harder one to achieve.  You cannot exert control to cause the cessation of hostilities.  That takes time and absence.  Even death cannot cease hostilities.  In some cases, it can even cause hostilities to breed.

I know that love can do it, because love cannot exist where there is hatred present.  But it's not as contagious or as boisterous and pushy as hatred.  It won't force it's way into someone's heart... it has to be invited and accepted and cared for.  It is a very weak force of nature in it's infancy... but it can grow to be mighty and strong if cared for properly.

The older I get, the more I understand some of the words of wisdom passed down to me from those older and wiser than I.  They made little to no sense at the time, until I saw them in practice in my own life.   It's not an easy thing to love your enemies.  It's not an easy thing to watch your friends and loved ones wrestling with a hatred that you know will consume them if they let it.  It's not an easy thing to give of yourself to those that "don't deserve it" based on what the law and the dogma say.   But everyone has a breaking point.  At some point, the fight must end.

We reap what we sow, make sure it's love that you grow.

Yet Another New Beginning

I guess it's time to start writing again.  Again, this could be good or bad.  I think it's good though.  At least it's a creative outlet.  :)  After living in Port Saint Lucie, FL for four years, I have moved out on my own in my own place... a little duplex in Cocoa, FL.  It's different.

I've lived with other people since October 31, 2003.   That's when Rob and I got our place in Orlando.  I've not lived alone for almost 9 years, and the silence is a bit deafening.  My friends keep telling me things like, "You'll get used to it."  "You'll make new friends."  "You've earned the rest."  "We're just a phone call away."

Those words are appreciated, don't get me wrong.  And I know I've said those words to others just as honestly and with as much goodwill as they.   Doesn't change much though.  The only thing that did get me going was a good friend who had the guts to say, "You chose this, you know. I didn't have anyone there for me when I started living on my own either."

It felt, initially, like a rebuke.  Like I wasn't there for her when she needed me.  Not saying I don't deserve one... but who likes rebukes... even if we do deserve them?  Over the past half-hour I've changed my mind about it.  She's one of the few that won't come to my self-created pity parties.  She helped clear the fog that I was in.

At any rate, quick update... more to come.  I started working for a new company, run by someone I used to work for years ago.  I work from home, which is good and bad... those of you who work from home know what I'm talking about.  I'm also hoping that, given enough time, I can actually start revisiting my creative outlets of music again.  I've started to make a few tentative steps back out into that arena.   I'll close this entry with an example of that.  Here's a remix I made of David Guetta's "Sexy Bitch."

Peace,
Jenna