Thursday, December 14, 2006

And now...

Whew... So now I can start thinking about my life again. Why now? Because the old shit is done and the new shit can start. Heh. The house has been sold, finally. Rob and I have nothing left to do with each other, finally. The old mortgages are paid off, finally. Things are starting to look up. I know I've been a terrible burden on some of my friends in how I've dealt with my life. It has been brutal and in typical Jenna fashion I've always tried to make the best out of what I've had to deal with even when it would probably have been better to "recognize the garbage and throw it out when it started to stink". Now that some things are finally finished, I can start paying attention to what I really want to do.

I can still say that I've never been happier where I am right now. Twink and Josh just let me be who I want to be, who I need to be and are always there to listen and be the best friends to me that a person could ever hope to have. The kids are, of course, challenging, fantastic, brilliant, retarded, and everything in between. I love them to death. Looking forward to spending Christmas with them.

This is not to say that we've not had our moments of doubt in this shared living arrangement... lord knows we've found each others' buttons pretty well now. But now I see a new future where we can all live together peacefully and without any drama between us. It's time I started to put back in to the community that has supported me so fully during my time of need.

I'm finally starting to really consider everything that I've started and have subsequently ignored or put on auto-pilot in order to make things easier, etc. It's a tad overwhelming but each day I'm realizing that I'm more and more "up to the challenge." Now, I'm making lists of what I want to get back to, revisit and pick up where I left off. Thank God for Twink. She has helped me out in so many ways I can't even begin to count them all. Whenever I've needed her, she's been there. I don't know what I did to deserve a friend like her... but I'm thankful for it every day.

My contract with Liberty Medical is also finally done. This means no more traveling to Port St. Lucie every day. This is a good thing. Although I will SEVERELY miss those friends I've made there, I am forever grateful for having them in my life and that I was able to touch their lives in a positive way as well. I know that our friendships will always be there and future time spent together will be all that more special (nyaaaaay!).

So now, with the money from the sale of the house, I feel more confident about being able to take my time and REALLY find a job I can sink my teeth into. Something that I can really enjoy, will help meet our needs as a family and still provide me with the funds to do some fun things I like to do (other than being a "family man"). I'm also looking forward to getting back to helping with the house. I'm ready to honor the commitments I made while still wrapping up the details of my old situation.

Basically... life is grand. Let it stay that for a while. :)


No comments: