So why is the word "deter" in the word "determined?" Doesn't make much sense to me. Anyway... Yes... I am determined. I've spent the past couple of hours digging through advertising possibilities for PLUR Records. Spin.com has a way to advertise on their site which is much cheaper than advertising in their magazine. DJ Times.... heh... well, let's just say I'd rather spend the money on a new car. I'd REALLY like to go to the DJ Expo this year and advertise there... but their rates are a little more expensive than we're ready for now... BUT...
(this is where the subject of the entry comes in)
I am DETERMINED to have a booth for PR at WMC next year in the exhibition hall. Hell, if possible, we might even sponsor a party (or help sponsor one). Maybe a joint effort between us and OGR could really move us forward. I wanna hit this one hard... or at least as hard as we can and not stop until we see the bright lights of Miami. So... that means I have less than 9 months to prepare, save, get people on board, get all the materials, etc. before the big trip. There are so many possibilities here and I know we can make it happen if we try. So be forewarned... WMC next year is a big PLURRY event, dammit. :)
I'm sure it will be expensive. I'm expecting to spend at least 10 grand on this event, but the exposure something like this could give us is beyond measure. We'll do some smaller events locally first as rehearsals. :) Now I'm even more determined to get the rest of life's personal stuff resolved as quickly as possible so we can move forward with this. I may not know what I'm doing yet... I may not know what I'm getting myself into yet... but I've never been afraid to dive in and try to swim. So watch out, world... PLUR Records is coming.
Monday, June 26, 2006
Sunday, June 25, 2006
A very long night
Wheee.... So Saturday we started the migration of settlement data and applications from Orlando to Denver. Got started at about 2 PM Denver time and didn't stop for a break until 4 am Sunday morning. Came back to the hotel and slept. Now I'm on a conference call that started about 2 and a half hours ago as we try to finish this up.
I've been torn between going in to the office to be more help or just stay on the line from the hotel room to help by instruction. I think it's better that they learn the process and the tools to resolve issues without me doing it for them. It may not be a good idea for me, personally, but there are plenty of opportunities out there and this process needs more people that understand it. If push comes to shove, I will of course go into the office if they desperately need me. But they seem to have things well in hand.
I've been thinking more and more about the return to a much simpler life and it really makes me smile. We didn't have much in Indiana when I was growing up and I don't see the need to have a ton of stuff now... not any more. Just what I need to get by is enough. As long as it's nice and it's something I like... I'm good. It's sometimes difficult to push back the ideas that I'm "going backwards" especially with enough people putting ideas in my head that I would be giving up a lot that I worked so hard for. But I wasn't working hard for that stuff. Not really. I was working hard in order to provide a good life for a family. That family never came to be in the way I thought it would. Now, I have the chance to provide for a new family and see if it works out right.
One thing I'm really getting irritated about is the continuous barrage of questions about what I'm doing and why. They put the seeds of doubt in my mind and then I have to go and clear these seeds out. Sometimes, in order to do that, I have to beleaguer my friends with my doubts and fears and then they have to help me sort through them again. It gets old ... I'm sure it gets old for them because it gets old for me too. Why do people doubt my good intentions? I'm certainly not trying to take the place of anyone and I'm certainly not trying to shoehorn myself in and force them to do something they don't want to do. I also don't feel coerced into doing this by anyone.
We've all talked about this and they've talked with the kids about it. To them, I'm family and to me, they're family. That's all there is to it. Maybe my friends and relatives don't see it that way and maybe their friends and relatives don't see it that way. But unless I'm being lied to on an order and degree to which I've never seen before in my life... that's the way it is and I don't care what anyone else thinks... and according to them... they don't either. I'm finally seeing some friggin' happiness for a change. Something I've been missing for a long time now.
I hope this helps explain everything that's been going on. People haven't understood why, over the past year, I've taken in so many people into my home... why I do what I do for people... my intentions and my actions... I miss family, dammit. This makes it all that much harder to be in Denver, of course. I want to make sure that it's understood that I'm not here because I want to be here. I'm not here because I don't want to be with family and friends. I'm here because the family needs me to be here. I'll always be that way and that will never change. It gets lonely... yes... BIG TIME. Maybe that's why I like 24 so much... it's the story of someone who wanted nothing more than the simple life with his family... and to provide for that family he did what he had to do. Unfortunately, that sacrifice affected his family too much. I just hope and pray that doesn't happen here.
To my Orlando family... all of them... everyone I mentioned in my last post... I love you all so very much and I miss you very much. Be home soon.
Peace,
Jenna
I've been torn between going in to the office to be more help or just stay on the line from the hotel room to help by instruction. I think it's better that they learn the process and the tools to resolve issues without me doing it for them. It may not be a good idea for me, personally, but there are plenty of opportunities out there and this process needs more people that understand it. If push comes to shove, I will of course go into the office if they desperately need me. But they seem to have things well in hand.
I've been thinking more and more about the return to a much simpler life and it really makes me smile. We didn't have much in Indiana when I was growing up and I don't see the need to have a ton of stuff now... not any more. Just what I need to get by is enough. As long as it's nice and it's something I like... I'm good. It's sometimes difficult to push back the ideas that I'm "going backwards" especially with enough people putting ideas in my head that I would be giving up a lot that I worked so hard for. But I wasn't working hard for that stuff. Not really. I was working hard in order to provide a good life for a family. That family never came to be in the way I thought it would. Now, I have the chance to provide for a new family and see if it works out right.
One thing I'm really getting irritated about is the continuous barrage of questions about what I'm doing and why. They put the seeds of doubt in my mind and then I have to go and clear these seeds out. Sometimes, in order to do that, I have to beleaguer my friends with my doubts and fears and then they have to help me sort through them again. It gets old ... I'm sure it gets old for them because it gets old for me too. Why do people doubt my good intentions? I'm certainly not trying to take the place of anyone and I'm certainly not trying to shoehorn myself in and force them to do something they don't want to do. I also don't feel coerced into doing this by anyone.
We've all talked about this and they've talked with the kids about it. To them, I'm family and to me, they're family. That's all there is to it. Maybe my friends and relatives don't see it that way and maybe their friends and relatives don't see it that way. But unless I'm being lied to on an order and degree to which I've never seen before in my life... that's the way it is and I don't care what anyone else thinks... and according to them... they don't either. I'm finally seeing some friggin' happiness for a change. Something I've been missing for a long time now.
I hope this helps explain everything that's been going on. People haven't understood why, over the past year, I've taken in so many people into my home... why I do what I do for people... my intentions and my actions... I miss family, dammit. This makes it all that much harder to be in Denver, of course. I want to make sure that it's understood that I'm not here because I want to be here. I'm not here because I don't want to be with family and friends. I'm here because the family needs me to be here. I'll always be that way and that will never change. It gets lonely... yes... BIG TIME. Maybe that's why I like 24 so much... it's the story of someone who wanted nothing more than the simple life with his family... and to provide for that family he did what he had to do. Unfortunately, that sacrifice affected his family too much. I just hope and pray that doesn't happen here.
To my Orlando family... all of them... everyone I mentioned in my last post... I love you all so very much and I miss you very much. Be home soon.
Peace,
Jenna
Saturday, June 24, 2006
A very long week
Gonna be a long one... entry that is. I've got a lot to catch up on here. So, here goes.
Sunday: Probably the worst trip of my life. It started with garlic rubber. Not garlic bread, garlic rubber. Yeah, it sucked because it looked really good in the display. Apparently they had had it there for a while. Got on the plane and just coughed and sneezed and felt miserable most the way. Couldn't sleep, couldn't do much of anything but feel like shit. Got to the hotel and found that they didn't put the hotel on the corporate card. So I had to put my own card down. Aggravating! The week is not starting well. So I go to my room, 6th floor looking out over ... uhm... Dry Creek road... nothing spectacular. It's a dark room... filled with dark furniture... very elegant... but cave-like. No kitchenette. *sigh* ... So I just crashed.
Monday: Went to work and bitched about the hotel. They fixed it. This was the fateful day of the migration. So after dealing with some plurrecords things and house things (the loan, the contract, etc.) we got ready for the migration. Started off bad because no one in the DB group had taken my notes (provided two weeks earlier) and made the required queries. So I had to do it myself, on the fly, at the beginning of the migration. *sigh*. We get through that hump and now it's time for the DB group to take over and start porting data over... a 6 to 8 hour task. So I go back to the batcave. The one good thing today was that the offer was accepted by the seller. So I picked up the fax the agent sent to the hotel, signed it and faxed it back. I was starting to feel a little chilly and realized soon enough my fever was coming back. Yay! So I decided to lay down a little knowing full well the evening was going to suck. Well, it sucked in a worse way (sorta). The DB group had problems porting the data and by 3 am eastern time, it still wasn't ready. So after several interruptive phone calls, they finally agreed to rollback and postpone the migration. Great. Wake me when there's ice cream.
Tuesday: Woke up.. no fever... but by this time the cold symptoms are just intolerable. That on top of the dry weather... my nose is fucked. Add to that some minor irritation I'm getting in my uhm... private area. I figured it was the weather, the soap, something. Ignored it for now and went to work to discuss what happened with the migration and figure out what to do about it. All the while, there's more work being done on the website, Liz is getting more records from Lucas, we made our first out-of-state sale from the site (YAY!!!!) and the house loans are in the process of getting approved. Managing all this starts to get the best of me but I deal.
Wednesday: Woke up feeling worse south of the border but still nothing I think is real bad yet. Oh well. Stuff to do, dammit. Lots of web work done today. Got several things set up properly where we can finally put MP3s up for sale. YAY! I put a couple of mine up there that were decent. I'll replace them when I get home with better versions. Started working on a way to get the sound samples to play in a player rather than by loading the sample into the page. That almost killed me because I thought I had screwed up some code. I get it all done... show it to Liz... and... well... she showed me something else better. *sigh*. Don't get me wrong... what we ended up using is MUCH better and I love it... I'm glad she showed it to me. I just wish I had spent the time earlier working with the new solution (the current solution) than futzing around with a lot of code I had to learn at the samne time I was installing it. Oh well. On top of all this... I did go to work and came home feeling even worse down in Texas. So I decided to find out why and found a lump in a VERY untenable place (not going to discuss where... I know where and that's all that matters). Anyway... it kinda freaked me out. So I figured I'd just bear through the migration (now scheduled for Saturday), and then excuse myself for my return trip and see my doc. Went to bed a little scared.. but okay.
Thursday: BAD PAIN! Woke up feeling like my $@&! was on fire. The lump was bigger and more painful too. So, there was no question... I called my boss and she took me to the emergency room. Turned out to be an absess which they chose to take care right there and then. Whee! Miles and miles away from anyone that I care about or that cares about me... going to the hospital with a doctor I don't know... getting surgery. With no insurance either. Can I get a woot!? Yeah, I thought not. But the good news is, it's handled and they gave me percosets (saves for later, biotches). I spent the day at the hotel working more on the site, trying to download tools that would allow me to utilize the sample player we bought and having no luck. Ended up just chatting with Liz for a bit and watching a couple of movies.
Friday: Woke up today and went to work feeling a little better. I managed to get the tool I need to work with and got the XML files made for the sample player. Signed all the paperwork for the equity loan and sent that back to Orlando, trained new developers on what a credit card is... (joy) ... and went to dinner with the woman I thought hated me. Turns out I was wrong. Always good to find that out. The Denver situation is a little different now. There's a player involved at the highest level that didn't like my e-mail I sent on my last day as a FT employee. Everyone else things I can walk on water (which I can as long as it's on the ground or frozen). Anyway... throughout all of this... I've been working ... a lot... on a lot of things. And coming home to ... well... nothing but my music, a couple of movies and this laptop.
I tried to talk to Liz about it tonite but her mind was somewhere else. When I realized we were on different pages and she was busy with something else, I figured I'd log out so I could concentrate on finishing up the XML files. So I told her I'd be back later and signed off, not really thinking anything else. Got the code finished and the files uploaded. Started testing and tried to message Liz... but she'd already checked out for the night. She left me a couple of messages which were rather terse... I guess I left the chat at an inappropriate time. Oh well... Par for the course at this point. I didn't mean to offend. Just thought I could get some stuff done and then we could both have our "other stuff" done and chat. Text is so impersonal with no emotions, facial expressions or body language. It sorta sucks. Sorry if I upset you, Liz. Wasn't my intention, honest!
It gets so lonely up here, tho. And I know my friends in Orlando have lives and have bad days, bad weeks, etc. And I don't mind listening to them bitch and moan because they do the same for me. Then we get over it and have a good chat. But tonite I'm really feeling it. I feel very removed from everything. The idea of spending another week here... the idea of working ALL weekend... the idea of coming back here at some point... they're all just disgusting to me... and this time I DON'T love it. I miss my family and friends something fierce. The part that kills me is that I know that when their bad day is over... they go back to their families and friends, cuddle up, snuggle up, and let the world piss off for a while. Meanwhile... up in Denver. It'd be different if I was some sort of Jack Bauer type of character with something going on all the time. At least I wouldn't have time to miss anyone. But as it is, right now... I'm in the long dark teatime of the soul and there's little to be done about it.
I did get to chat with my friend Jon in Mass tonight tho. He helped me get out of the funk I was in. I sent him MP3s of my latest mix CD and we listened to it together and chatted. It was nice. I haven't had the opportunity to sit and enjoy some music with a friend for a long time. I've missed it. I hope this business with the house gets wrapped up soon. It *IS* something I want to do... but at the same time... the process is just maddening. It was last time too, though. Being in Denver for part of it is not making it any better, though. Heh.
So... that brings us up to now. I'm sure I've left some things out because I'm pretty exhausted and I haven't gotten to sleep before 3 am any night this week. So I think I'm gonna go crash. Hopefully tomorrow will go smoothly at work and I won't have to worry about a bunch of BS. Even so, I still have a week in Denver (and a plane ticket to fix since I was supposed to leave today and never got the chance to fix the ticket) before I can go home. I miss Liz, Josh, Taylor, Matt, David, Steven, Rob, Laura, Jim, Michelle, Justin, Nicole, Kyle, Mat, Brynja, Ansley, Heather, Rabbit ... ARGH! I miss y'all something fierce... and can't wait until I get home. Keep the home fires burning. I'll get there as soon as I can.
Sunday: Probably the worst trip of my life. It started with garlic rubber. Not garlic bread, garlic rubber. Yeah, it sucked because it looked really good in the display. Apparently they had had it there for a while. Got on the plane and just coughed and sneezed and felt miserable most the way. Couldn't sleep, couldn't do much of anything but feel like shit. Got to the hotel and found that they didn't put the hotel on the corporate card. So I had to put my own card down. Aggravating! The week is not starting well. So I go to my room, 6th floor looking out over ... uhm... Dry Creek road... nothing spectacular. It's a dark room... filled with dark furniture... very elegant... but cave-like. No kitchenette. *sigh* ... So I just crashed.
Monday: Went to work and bitched about the hotel. They fixed it. This was the fateful day of the migration. So after dealing with some plurrecords things and house things (the loan, the contract, etc.) we got ready for the migration. Started off bad because no one in the DB group had taken my notes (provided two weeks earlier) and made the required queries. So I had to do it myself, on the fly, at the beginning of the migration. *sigh*. We get through that hump and now it's time for the DB group to take over and start porting data over... a 6 to 8 hour task. So I go back to the batcave. The one good thing today was that the offer was accepted by the seller. So I picked up the fax the agent sent to the hotel, signed it and faxed it back. I was starting to feel a little chilly and realized soon enough my fever was coming back. Yay! So I decided to lay down a little knowing full well the evening was going to suck. Well, it sucked in a worse way (sorta). The DB group had problems porting the data and by 3 am eastern time, it still wasn't ready. So after several interruptive phone calls, they finally agreed to rollback and postpone the migration. Great. Wake me when there's ice cream.
Tuesday: Woke up.. no fever... but by this time the cold symptoms are just intolerable. That on top of the dry weather... my nose is fucked. Add to that some minor irritation I'm getting in my uhm... private area. I figured it was the weather, the soap, something. Ignored it for now and went to work to discuss what happened with the migration and figure out what to do about it. All the while, there's more work being done on the website, Liz is getting more records from Lucas, we made our first out-of-state sale from the site (YAY!!!!) and the house loans are in the process of getting approved. Managing all this starts to get the best of me but I deal.
Wednesday: Woke up feeling worse south of the border but still nothing I think is real bad yet. Oh well. Stuff to do, dammit. Lots of web work done today. Got several things set up properly where we can finally put MP3s up for sale. YAY! I put a couple of mine up there that were decent. I'll replace them when I get home with better versions. Started working on a way to get the sound samples to play in a player rather than by loading the sample into the page. That almost killed me because I thought I had screwed up some code. I get it all done... show it to Liz... and... well... she showed me something else better. *sigh*. Don't get me wrong... what we ended up using is MUCH better and I love it... I'm glad she showed it to me. I just wish I had spent the time earlier working with the new solution (the current solution) than futzing around with a lot of code I had to learn at the samne time I was installing it. Oh well. On top of all this... I did go to work and came home feeling even worse down in Texas. So I decided to find out why and found a lump in a VERY untenable place (not going to discuss where... I know where and that's all that matters). Anyway... it kinda freaked me out. So I figured I'd just bear through the migration (now scheduled for Saturday), and then excuse myself for my return trip and see my doc. Went to bed a little scared.. but okay.
Thursday: BAD PAIN! Woke up feeling like my $@&! was on fire. The lump was bigger and more painful too. So, there was no question... I called my boss and she took me to the emergency room. Turned out to be an absess which they chose to take care right there and then. Whee! Miles and miles away from anyone that I care about or that cares about me... going to the hospital with a doctor I don't know... getting surgery. With no insurance either. Can I get a woot!? Yeah, I thought not. But the good news is, it's handled and they gave me percosets (saves for later, biotches). I spent the day at the hotel working more on the site, trying to download tools that would allow me to utilize the sample player we bought and having no luck. Ended up just chatting with Liz for a bit and watching a couple of movies.
Friday: Woke up today and went to work feeling a little better. I managed to get the tool I need to work with and got the XML files made for the sample player. Signed all the paperwork for the equity loan and sent that back to Orlando, trained new developers on what a credit card is... (joy) ... and went to dinner with the woman I thought hated me. Turns out I was wrong. Always good to find that out. The Denver situation is a little different now. There's a player involved at the highest level that didn't like my e-mail I sent on my last day as a FT employee. Everyone else things I can walk on water (which I can as long as it's on the ground or frozen). Anyway... throughout all of this... I've been working ... a lot... on a lot of things. And coming home to ... well... nothing but my music, a couple of movies and this laptop.
I tried to talk to Liz about it tonite but her mind was somewhere else. When I realized we were on different pages and she was busy with something else, I figured I'd log out so I could concentrate on finishing up the XML files. So I told her I'd be back later and signed off, not really thinking anything else. Got the code finished and the files uploaded. Started testing and tried to message Liz... but she'd already checked out for the night. She left me a couple of messages which were rather terse... I guess I left the chat at an inappropriate time. Oh well... Par for the course at this point. I didn't mean to offend. Just thought I could get some stuff done and then we could both have our "other stuff" done and chat. Text is so impersonal with no emotions, facial expressions or body language. It sorta sucks. Sorry if I upset you, Liz. Wasn't my intention, honest!
It gets so lonely up here, tho. And I know my friends in Orlando have lives and have bad days, bad weeks, etc. And I don't mind listening to them bitch and moan because they do the same for me. Then we get over it and have a good chat. But tonite I'm really feeling it. I feel very removed from everything. The idea of spending another week here... the idea of working ALL weekend... the idea of coming back here at some point... they're all just disgusting to me... and this time I DON'T love it. I miss my family and friends something fierce. The part that kills me is that I know that when their bad day is over... they go back to their families and friends, cuddle up, snuggle up, and let the world piss off for a while. Meanwhile... up in Denver. It'd be different if I was some sort of Jack Bauer type of character with something going on all the time. At least I wouldn't have time to miss anyone. But as it is, right now... I'm in the long dark teatime of the soul and there's little to be done about it.
I did get to chat with my friend Jon in Mass tonight tho. He helped me get out of the funk I was in. I sent him MP3s of my latest mix CD and we listened to it together and chatted. It was nice. I haven't had the opportunity to sit and enjoy some music with a friend for a long time. I've missed it. I hope this business with the house gets wrapped up soon. It *IS* something I want to do... but at the same time... the process is just maddening. It was last time too, though. Being in Denver for part of it is not making it any better, though. Heh.
So... that brings us up to now. I'm sure I've left some things out because I'm pretty exhausted and I haven't gotten to sleep before 3 am any night this week. So I think I'm gonna go crash. Hopefully tomorrow will go smoothly at work and I won't have to worry about a bunch of BS. Even so, I still have a week in Denver (and a plane ticket to fix since I was supposed to leave today and never got the chance to fix the ticket) before I can go home. I miss Liz, Josh, Taylor, Matt, David, Steven, Rob, Laura, Jim, Michelle, Justin, Nicole, Kyle, Mat, Brynja, Ansley, Heather, Rabbit ... ARGH! I miss y'all something fierce... and can't wait until I get home. Keep the home fires burning. I'll get there as soon as I can.
Sunday, June 18, 2006
Headed back to Denver
If it seems like the only time I have to update this anymore is when I'm in Devner... you're right. Life in Orlando is BUSY! Between PLUR Records, finding a new place to live, preparing to sell the current house and little things that FHMS has for me to do... I've been pretty damned busy. Hopefully, once I'm in the new house things will settle down. Of course, I'm not sure how much I can think that either because there's gonna be a lot of changes made to the house, etc. Lots o' stuff to do to it.
Right now, I'm at the airport stealing some of their wireless bandwidth to write this while I wait for the plane to be ready to board. So, I figured I'd catch up on a few things.
Let's see... the short list:
Well, I see someone at the desk now and I need to get a seat assignment... so I'm gonna close this for now. More later.
Right now, I'm at the airport stealing some of their wireless bandwidth to write this while I wait for the plane to be ready to board. So, I figured I'd catch up on a few things.
Let's see... the short list:
- Josh and Twink don't have a place to live after July. So we all talked about it and decided to get a house together. The equity in my home would more than covert the DP for a new house.
- We found a house, inspected it... found 27000 mold spores per cubic meter and said, "uhm, no" It was a discouraging day.
- Found another house yesterday which we both like and we think it's do-able. It means a lot of hard work prepping my house to sell and getting the new house cleaned up and fixed up. But I can't stand by and watch my friends (and their children) lose their home without doing something.
- I've somehow managed to get sick... I left the house with a 100 degree fever... dunno what that will mean for the next few days but it should be interesting.
- Got some new old-school records in for the site. They're absolutely awesome and will probably sell very well (if we can get people to recognize that we exist).
- Twink and Josh got married. That was an interesting day. The "ceremony" and the gathering was wonderful... that evening something a little effed up happened between David and I... which put me in a bad place... but I'm better now. I might write about here, I dunno. We'll see.
- Got financing going for the new house we're trying to buy. Somehow, I'm going to have to manage all that from Denver. That should prove interesting too.
Well, I see someone at the desk now and I need to get a seat assignment... so I'm gonna close this for now. More later.
Thursday, June 1, 2006
Be Careful What You Wish For
So... I've been bitching and moaning a bit about FHMS not really having anything I can do. Well, that all changed today. The migration schedule has been moved forward 11 days and so everything's gone into high gear all of a sudden. This is a welcome change in that it's a change... but sheese... haven't they heard of easing into the next gear instead of trying to throttle it like there's no tomorrow? But... this will enable some other good things to happen personally... so I bite the bullet and do what I have to do. It sucks... but c'est la vie.
I went to Unison's location in Glendale, CO today. Met their HR person and am gratified that I'm back in a small company again... serving big clients. How long this will last? Who's to say. But at least I can walk away without losing my job. Kinda cool idea. I like this so far.
Of course, this is all in the effort to put more money into PLUR Records and get it going. Thank GOD for Twink ... handling all the business I can't get to while I'm up here making money for the company. I don't know what I'd do without her. It's not easy for her, I know... she has other responsibilities too. I appreciate every little thing she does. Big Kudos!
Anyway, this was just a quick note. Nothing more to relate at the moment. More Later.
I went to Unison's location in Glendale, CO today. Met their HR person and am gratified that I'm back in a small company again... serving big clients. How long this will last? Who's to say. But at least I can walk away without losing my job. Kinda cool idea. I like this so far.
Of course, this is all in the effort to put more money into PLUR Records and get it going. Thank GOD for Twink ... handling all the business I can't get to while I'm up here making money for the company. I don't know what I'd do without her. It's not easy for her, I know... she has other responsibilities too. I appreciate every little thing she does. Big Kudos!
Anyway, this was just a quick note. Nothing more to relate at the moment. More Later.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)