Thursday, November 24, 2005

The Calm

Today is Thanksgiving. I have today through Sunday off. It's going to be a long and interesting weekend, I believe. Rob and I "officially" broke up romantically about two weeks ago (even though it really happened long before that). We've finally discovered that we're much better together as friends than as lovers. Every time we try to get involved as lovers, one or both of us are not satisfied and we begin to be mean to each other as a result of the unfulfilled expectations from each other. It's not a bad thing or a good thing... it's just a thing. Others seems to be attaching "meaning" to it more than we are, tho. Whatever, that's their problem... not ours.

His parents are coming today to spend the day with us. They're also spending the night too. It should be interesting to see how all this plays out. I truly hope they can see and understand where we are with this and that we're okay with it. We're being adults about it. Yeah, there were some childish moments like "Well you started it!" and shit like that... but that's a natural reaction. I don't want to lose his friendship or theirs. But I won't tolerate any disrespect or "adult parenting" from them or anyone else for that matter. We can make our own decisions and that's what we've done. Deal with it.

I opened up a couple of entries in my journal that were private before. Felt okay with sharing them now. There are still a few that are way too personal for me to open up at the moment. I may never open them up. But re-reading through a lot of this has helped me follow the progression of my life recently. Heh. I guess sometimes you just gotta look back and say, "How the hell did I get here?"

Tomorrow I may be going to Tampa. Either tomorrow or Saturday. I'm picking up Mouse. He's coming to stay here for a little while until he's able to move up to NC. Why here? He has no where else to go at the moment and I offered. I won't let a friend of mine be homeless. I'm definitely going to Tampa on Sunday. Rob's invited me to go with him to MOSI. Sounds fun, actually. I'm hoping V goes with us. It's her birthday and I know she'd enjoy getting out of the house and doing something "normal" as she puts it. Normalcy is something subjective anyway, so whatever. I love her but my view of normalcy is a tad different I guess. :)

There's rumor of a party this weekend too. I'm hoping there is since we're not going to see Brad Smith on Saturday night now. V can't afford to go/doesn't want to go... Twink doesn't want to hear House music, and I don't want to go without either of them... so... we're looking for something else now. This party would be a good thing because we might be able to get a DJ slot for Laura (Twink's sister). That would be awesome. She's really good and she used to DJ on the radio all the time. Familial responsibilities have taken precedence in her life recently and she just needs a break. I so hope this all goes down and goes down in the right way. That would be freakin' awesome. :)

I'm very VERY proud of Twink. She wrote her first tune the other day. :) While at her house last weekend she asked me to show her what to do in ACID Pro and Soundforge. So I did. And just as I thought, she sat down and put together a track that was unique and very much her. It didn't have all the elements she wanted... but it was definitely the best "first attempt" I've heard from anyone in a long time. Yay! If that's how she gets started... I can't wait to hear what she can come up with with some practice. :)

Well, that's enough for right now. I'll write more later after events unfold. ** poof **

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