There Is No Subject

Note: I tried to post this earlier today (about 10 in the morning) but I kept getting errors. (Myspace again... blah)

Feeling much better today. I've had time to think about events and people in my life, what they all mean to me and how to interact with all of it. The answer was, of course, the same answer I've always come up with. "To thine own self be true." Everything else will fall into place after that and be much easier to deal with. No more second guessing, no more trying to shield or be shielded... whatever. If I can not be true to myself and my feelings, then I'm worth absolutely nothing to anyone else.

"24" was absolutely kick-ass last night... although I kept getting interrupted. 7 people at the house, 1 on the computer making music, 1 on another computer playing games, 2 in the loft watching 24, 1 getting his hair colored while the other was coloring it... and me trying to organize dinner, making sure everyone had what they needed and still watch the show. But I only missed like 10 minutes of it in total... and I got to see the kick-ass ending with Chloe becoming "Rambette." That was as good as, if not better than, having a sharp-witted trademark Jack Bauer line at the end of the show!

I tried "Kronik Energy" drink today... a suggestion from Twink. It's too bitter for me, tho... and I'm trying the one WITH sugar. Back to BooKoo and it's 4 buhjillyun grams of sugar. Other than that, nothing much to report... oh... my friend Chris showed up last night and balanced my studio. MUCH HAPPINESS!! I still need another set of quarter-inch cables tho... he chided me for not having spare cables as "every good sound technician always has sets and sets of spare cables." So I'll go to Sam Ash sometime today and get another pair (or 2 so I can have a spare set). Anyway... it's almost like a brand new system compared to how it sounded before. It's a good thing I don't have bigger speakers than the JBL monitors I have... otherwise my house would be crumbling from the "aural assault" last night. :)

Anyway.... more later as work beckons me right now.

It's raining shoes

The expression, "waiting for the other shoe to drop" comes to mind today. But in this case, it's raining shoes. Another expression: "Between a rock and a hard place" comes to mind... but in this case... there's also a trap door underneath and a fraying rope being clinged to.

I feel as if I've wronged someone while attempting to do something right... wronged someone very close to me. The shitty part is, I don't know if I have or not. There are times when you can go up to that person and ask to talk and work things out... and then there are times when you have to back off and let them come to you when they feel like it.... if they feel like it.

Those are the hard times. Being a peacemaker with a martyr complex, I tend to do anything and everything I can to try to help others make peace and resolve conflict... especially when that conflict is between family and/or friends. Lately tho, it seems to be getting me deeper into trouble more often than not. How do you say no to a friend that asks you for help? How do you deal with that when that help may be at odds with another friend? Why do people always put the people closest to them in the middle of everything? Maybe they were already in the middle of it to begin with. FEH... It gives me a headache.

At some point, something's gotta give. Whatever it is, and whenever it does... I just hope we can put the pieces back together with stronger glue.

Waiting to Inhale... *evil grin*

Nothing much to post today, to be honest. Just a few things running through my head. Kung Fu Hustle comes out this weekend. I really want to see that. It looks great... I hope I'm not disappointed. One of my absolute best friends (clearly an illegally adopted sister) is going out of town this weekend so I'm sad for me but happy for her... then again, it depends on whether or not she has more fun than I this weekend... which I calculate the odds at being pretty "high" in favor of that reality.

"24" kicked some major booty last Monday. Jack's closing line was again another triumph: [Spoken to a perp with 3 or 4 broken fingers, handcuffed to a car's "oh shit" handle] "Here, this will help with the pain." --*~BAM!!~*-- [Knuckle sandwich.. nice!]. *sigh*... Keifer... oh Keifer.

Uhm what? Sorry, was miles away for a moment there.

Anyway, far too much to do tonight. The weekend approaches steadily and I must make sure I'm fully prepared for it... or it will be gone before I have the chance to enjoy it! I'm debating the idea of going to "The Underground" in Tampa on Friday night. I believe The Crystal Method are supposed to be there... but it might be Saturday night... ehh... I'll work that out later.

I've been toying with some new ideas for remixes... some of them are yielding interesting results while others are... well, they're riding the short bus to the recycle bin. Some bands I'm distorting at the moment are AWB, America and The Pointer Sisters. I'm also toying with the theme from the third season of Farscape. That one is coming together... but it is defying all genres of electronica that I'm familliar with. But oh well, it's fun regardless. :)

The Watch

Okay, this is kinda weird. Myspace works fine at home but at work I get all kinds of crazy fonts and I lose most of the graphics. Not sure why when other sites work just fine. So far, only myspace has been problematic. Anyway... regardless I managed to get a photo uploaded of the watch I was talking about. Check out my pics and you'll see it there. In other news, I now know what time it is. Muahh.

Back home...

Well, we're back home again and from all appearances the cats (we have 3) did not throw any outlandish parties while we were gone. Which is a good thing because I'd be really pissed if they didn and didn't invite us.

I found a candy bracelet/watch combo that I just had to have. The watch is detachable so I can attach it to any bracelet I choose to make. Handy! I also bought a set of earrings and we looked at wedding rings. The place we went has jewelry that is hand-made by a master goldsmith named Joan Michlin. Although we're still shopping around, if we do go with her stuff, this is the ring I'm most interested in:

It's actually meant to be an engagement ring AND a wedding band together. You buy the ring with the stones first for engagment and then the band later for the wedding. I'll probably change the band to be white gold since Rob wants a ring that is white gold and yellow gold like this:

But like I said, we're still looking around. It would just be really neat to have rings that are not only symbols of our marriage, etc... but also unique, hand-made works of art.

At any rate, we're in no rush. There's plenty of time for all that. We still have other places to look and something else may strike our collective fancies more later. Work again tomorrow, blah... but also "24" tomorrow night... woohoo! 7 more episodes to go!

Mmmmmrph

Blah... I got about an hour and a half of sleep last night. It is quite dangerous to wave an almost untouched case of whipped cream in front of two fiends... you do the math.

I'm supposed to be going to Sarasota today with Rob to see his folks. Blargh... I'm barely functioning... maybe at 23% normal capacity. But, a little help from BooKoo will fix that right up. I really am looking forward to the being there... and I guess I can sleep on the way, right?

Waking up with BooKoo and Prodigy

Okay, I'll admit that I was a little harsh on Dieselboy the other day. I just wasn't feelin' it then. I apologize because today I'm waking up to Prodigy with the assistance of BooKoo (which I just realized has 110 calories and 27 grams of sugar carbs... yikes... I might as well not eat the rest of the day). Why Prodigy? Someone almost set the office kitchen on fire which then in turn caused someone to break into their own rendition of Firestarter... from that... well, you can figure it out.

I've been invited to go to The Grotto tonight... it's been a long time since I went downtown, tho. Too roccoco, too bizantine... too busy. But, circumstances were different then so I might enjoy it now. There's also a couple of parties coming up that look fun, too. More on those later as things develop.

Going to Sarasota this weekend to see the in-laws. Should be fun. Sarasota's a nice area and who knows, I might get to the beach if it's nice enough. I have to go to Ho Ho's and get their famous Sesame Chicken. They make it with a white gravy type sauce that is just to die for. I've also been thinking about a trip to Ohio to go back to King's Island. It's been forever since I've been there... used to go there as a kid when I lived in Indiana. The Beast calls to me... I must ride The Beast... must ride.... must.... ride.

Oh yah... I'm working on a rather ambitious project idea... I want to find a way to remix the theme from Farscape... but it has to be the version from the third or fourth season. The first and second season's theme was just a little too intense with the vocals. Anyway, I guess I should also do an artist sign-up on myspace, eh? I'll get around to it eventually.

Anyway... that's what's in my head at the moment. More later after I scrub it with something guaranteed to kill brain cells.

Uhm... what?!

Okay, I've noticed something that kinda disturbs me, strike that... it really disturbs me. I've been getting messages on myspace from guys asking if I'm into being friends with benefits or am into "getting with" married guys, and that I'm a MILF, etc.

First of all... I'm not a MILF. Although I appreciate the sentiment... I'm not a mom, I more than likely will never be a mom. So, calling me a "Mom I'd Like to Frell" kinda creeps me out in that respect.

Secondly, I'm very VERY happily engaged to be married. I've met the one man that I want to be with for the rest of our natural lives. That's hard to do and you don't just give up on it for a quickie.

So why am I even on myspace, ravematch, etc? To meet people who like to party, who feel the music in their souls NATURALLY, who are good fun-loving people who don't hate or judge, etc. It's about community, it's about all the good things of life.

Some may say that the sex IS one of the good things in life... well sure it is... but for me, it's something shared with one and only one. Everything else is openly shared with everyone. :)

So, just chill out and have a good time. Keep your pants on and dance with me! Or give me a light show. Sheese... do something would ya? ;)

Owwie...

Well, had a nice relaxing day at home today. However, I got a little bit of an owwie since I laid out a little too long in the sun today. It's been a couple of years since I tanned and I forgot how strong the sun can be. :( But it'll get better. Once I have some good color again I'll take some new pics and post 'em. Not much happenin' tonite. Just chillin' with Rob and the cats. Picked up some new CDs yesterday and finally got to really listen to them today. So far, I'm not upset with my purchases. :) Some trance and the UMF 7 CD (which I went to this year... fun fun fun). Anyway, that's all for now. Later.

Assumptions

Well, it's technically tomorrow... but it still feels like last night. Went shopping today and spent more money than I should have, as usual. But I'm happy with what I got. I replaced the miniature Eurorack Mixer I had with a Soundcraft Spirit ES so I can actually have everything plugged in at once now rather than swapping patch cables whenever I want to work with something else. Expensive at the moment but it will pay for itself soon enough. :)

Had some friends over tonight and the discussion turned to what we've done and who we knew and where they've gone, etc. A lot of assumptions were made and it got me kinda frustrated, actually. I try not to be too imbalanced, really. I'm a Libra, after all. I get annoyed when someone tries to pidgeon-hole me. I have a lot of interests and I don't overdo any of them, as far as I can tell. I took it all in fun on the outside... but I felt like I was being stereotyped, sorta. I dunno, I'm tired too so I may just be rambling (I probably am). Anyway, other than the mixer, I picked up some new discs and the 12" of Switch. I just have a feeling I can do something with that... dunno why.

I also picked up a Light Sabre. Yes, a Light Sabre. Best Buy has the Masterworks Replicas of the Light Sabres from Star Wars and I just had to have one. It's one thing to see them on a web page and another to see them right within your grasp. As soon as I saw it, I knew I wasn't walking out of the store without one. It's cool, it lights up and down in sequence and makes all the noises. After playing with it for a while I thought to myself... "Ooh... now I have a REALLY BIG glow stick! Woohoo!" Can't wait until the next party! ;)

Anyway, I've got a big lug waiting for me in bed so I'm gonna close this for now. Later days, better lays. -- Peace--

Weekend!

Yay... the weekend. :) Gettin' ready to lay out in the sun for a little bit and listen to some stuff I just downloaded. My friend Stacy is here this weekend too and we're planning to go out and do some shopping. And there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Might go out to Vinyl Frontier and see if they have anything interesting, probably check out Best Buy and the Florida Oriental Trading Company since she's WAY into anime. I think she was born in the wrong time, wrong place and wrong race... not sure what type of identity crisis that is tho.

Anyway, nothing much else to report. If anything exciting happens, I'll probably post it. :) Tootles.

My job sux

Yah, everyone says that, right... but mine really does. I got woken up this morning at 10 to 4 in the morning from my ex-boss asking me to do my ex-job because the new boss of the new people doing my old job doesn't want to call his people in the middle of the night to fix a problem that needs fixing. It also became apparent that the problem won't be fixed right away which means I'll probably have to be on call all day now. Argh! Mr. Spielberg? I know you're out there somewhere and I know you only work with Johnny exclusively... but maybe you know someone else that would like to give a girl a chance at composing for their film Hmm? Please?! I'm beggin' here!

I hope the day doesn't play out like I'm expecting it to... but we'll see

Too early

Yes, it is too early for D'n'B.... but that's okay... it's better than Happy Hardcore in the morning. Anyway, so far today has been uneventful other than the aural assault next to me and the strange IM from my sweetie tempting me to stare at The Hypnotic Cat. Ebaum's world failed to entertain me today, but something awful had a decent Photoshop Phriday dealing with Virgin Atlantic advertisements. I chuckled once or twice.

The rest of the day will more than likely be a continuation of this cacophony of chaotic circumstances which all add up to be one more wasted day. But at least I'm not Jerry Seinfeld... god, that would be awful.

Oh yah, some friends are trying to entice me to see Sahara tonite which, other than the appearance of Matthew McConaughey, I have no interest in seeing. So I'll probably sit at home tonight waiting for Rob to come home and say, "You were right, it sucked." More later.