Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Feeling Better

So, I'm feeling better now. My illness is starting to subside. One of the meds the doc gave me on Friday caused an allergic reaction and my nose blew up to one and a half times it's size, became red, cracked and just generally awful. It was Nasonex. Now... I suppose it's possible that it may have had to do with the application of it. It's entirely possible that I somehow shot the juice straight through some pores... but then there's no real telling. Regardless, once I stopped taking that, it started to calm down. It's not 100% yet, but better.

I've managed to whittle away a little more of my debt and I think I have a new solution to an old problem that's been causing me some grief. Gonna try it out.

Other than that, I finally got the shower in my bathroom cleaned up. It was AWFUL. I never used it (and I think the last time it was used was about a million years ago). A friend of Josh's is supposed to come over tonight to tear a hole in the wall and fix the plumbing problem with the shower. Between that, finishing up the mold/mildew removal and making sure there are no leaks in the shower, I'll be busy for a while. After that, there's the floors in both bathrooms, the floor in the laundry room, a couple of doors to replace, painting and landscaping. I think once those things are done, we'll be a lot closer to getting the house completely ready to sell. Of course, it will be great and we won't want to leave then... but it's time to stop spinning our wheels and move forward. I'll never find my own place in this life/world if I stay in the situation I'm in now. One day at a time, one step at a time, until we're fully up to speed.

In the romance department, I was very irritated with a certain someone. Not getting into details here but let's just say we were on different pages and I think (hope?) we're finally on the same page now.

I finally made peace with myself over my part of what happened between me and Rob. I can now say that I fully understand what it takes to be a supportive and loving spouse/partner now. I hope that Rob finds someone that can be the person he wanted me to be. Someone who he can laugh, dance, sing and love with for now and through eternity. Someone who will see him through God's eyes. He deserves it... he's a good man.

I'm thinking about finding a church to go to. I haven't been a church-goer in a long time but it seems like a good step for me. But, it has to be one where the spirit of Love is there and binds the people together ... not one that is there to worship a figurehead of what Love is or one that is there for show... a true community of Love is what I'm looking for. Not physical love, not love of money, ideas, fame, talent, etc. Love for each other. Companionship, cooperation, and community. These are what I'm looking for. People who celebrate the ideas of Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter and Birthdays every day of the year. People who recognize the differences and similarities between each other and yet let neither of these divide them from the spirit of Love. People who would just as soon step up to help you out as they would their own kin. This is what I'm after. To be part of that again would be a wonderful thing.

You can tell if the church is like that when you walk in. You can see whether the people truly know and care about each other... or whether they're there for show and tell. You can tell if the church is there just to pay the bills ... or if wouldn't matter if they had a building or just a patch of dirt to congregate in. You'll know.

So, having said all that and catching people up, I'm going to try to get some work done now. Have a good Hump day... try to have a good hump if you can. *wink*


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