Last night I got a call from someone I didn't expect to hear from. She and I have had an interesting past together. She sent me an e-mail that I finally realized was a "Thank You" note. She described how her view on life, enemies, friends, etc. had changed based on the experiences we had shared. They had changed for the better for her. I had been looking at from a very selfish viewpoint up until then. This time, I let God show me what she was saying. It would be an understatement to say that I was moved. I realized that although our experiences had been fraught with despicable actions toward each other, we had both learned so much from the experience that it was beyond our ken at the time to see what the purpose of it was.
I thank God for finally revealing to me the reason for the "shortcut" through the wilderness ... it didn't feel like a shortcut at the time... but I know that based on the direction I was heading before I met her, it would have taken me a MUCH LONGER time to figure it out.
It's hard to know when we're being selfish sometimes. What is taught is not always learned as it was intended to be learned.
On another note, I found that I'm going to have quite the task ahead of me regarding the house in Orlando. Apparently one of the bathrooms is in dire need of cleaning... the fridge still has food in it... and the back door lock has been broken (which means there might have been homeless people in the house at some point... only God knows what I might find there). So I'm leaving for Orlando EARLY on Saturday to get to the house in plenty of time to review it and take care of some things before the realtor gets there. I should also have had the lawn resolved before then, too.
Lastly, I was given a tiny revelation today. Last night I stopped Amadeus (Travis' cat) from killing a mouse in the driveway. But I apparently didn't notice the other mouse. I found it this morning. I know that in the wild, the mouse acts as food for the cat. I know it's nature. But I have a soft spot for all God's creatures great and small.
While I was thinking about this, I was reminded of a passage in Isaiah, chapter 11, verse 6:
"And the wolf will dwell with the lamb, And the leopard will lie down with the young goat, And the calf and the young lion and the fatling together; And a little boy will lead them."
I was thinking last night that this was something we were to achieve here on Earth. Then I remembered Luke 12:51:
"Do you think I came to bring peace on earth? No, I tell you, but division."
I thought about this and realized that the wolf dwelling with the lamb was symbolic for the peace that death provides us... when we are all truly equal again. It is not for us to change the nature that God (in His infinite wisdom) has put in motion. He knew that through conflict we would become stronger and would understand the nature of that strength and when to use it. I never liked conflict, but I understand it's purpose now.
I find it slightly humorous that I took several trips via mind-expanding substances to find the answers to life, existence, behavior, etc. only to come full circle and re-discover the words written years ago as they were meant for me to read. Now I just need to get a Bible again.
Peace,
Jenna
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