Saturday, October 11, 2008

What are you anyway?

I wrote this as a response to a question on TS Dating where someone had asked what a real TS is since he had found so many "fakers" on the site. There was a lot of "yeah! there ARE a lot of fakers!" going on in response and I had to step in and say something for those whose voices were not being heard. I guess I just can't get rid of the Superman gene no matter how hard I try.

This is going to be a rather lengthy post and I apologize to those out there with short attention spans. Try to stick with it, tho, as you are able.

To answer the question from a grammatical/definitive angle, here's what has to say about it:

1. a person who has undergone a sex change operation [syn: transsexual]
2. a person whose sexual identification is entirely with the opposite sex [syn: transsexual]

I'm not about to go on about what one is supposed to be beyond that other than to say this: Look at women in life. There are ALL kinds. To assume that there is only ONE kind of transexual would be just as heinous as saying there's only one kind of woman or one kind of man.

Looking back, I can see that for me, personally, the physical journey of transition was to make the outer body image match the inner body image. It was so that when I look into the mirror, I don't see a stranger's face. That's me, personally.

I absolutely laud and lift up those who make changes in their lives to bring about their own happiness as long as it does not bring physical harm to another creature on God's Green Earth.

Mental & Emotional harm are definitely nothing to dismiss, however I can personally attest to the ability of a strong mind to only become stronger through this kind of torture.

Before my surgery, I sought division between the gender expressions. I looked down my nose at anyone who was not serious about surgical reassignment and considered them fake, shallow, only about sex, and treated people... human beings... with a holier-than-thou attitude. I was righteous and they were scum. I was goal-oriented, centered, focused and deliriously happy with myself and my friends who all agreed with me.

After my surgery, I went through a period of depression the likes of which I had never before experienced. I sought out a group of friends that were "gender normal" but accepted all humans thinking that I could finally fit in to the society I so desperately wanted to be a part of in the role that I wanted to play.

The problem is, my secret was discovered and became known throughout my group of friends. Suddenly, I was an enemy... not because I had changed my gender, but because I had lied to them. With love and patience, they got over it... but I had a great struggle with it, personally. In the end, I lost my lover of 10 years, my house, my job and eventually all the friends I had made prior to surgery, and those after my surgery.

It has taken me a VERY long time to recuperate from all this. To be able to stand up to ANYONE who asks the questions and say, "Yes, you're right, I didn't *NEED* to change. There was nothing wrong with me before. And there's nothing wrong with me now, either."

Look at us... all of us... Normies, CDs, TVs, TSs, GQs, DQs, whatever the label... take a really GOOD look. We are all those who stand up to a society that says, "You must live like this" and we respond with a healthy, "Hell No, We Won't GO!" attitude. That's incredible! That's something to celebrate! The more division we create, the worse things gets. It requires more legislation, more definition, more and more and more and more ... red tape and bullshit.

Live and Let Live isn't a personal motto. It's a motto for ALL people.

I bring this to you as an honest, loving warning about what hate for love's sake can bring to one's life. Someone else's way may not be your way, but if it's making them happy and not hurting another in the process, let them have their life their way.

Henry David Thoreau said it very poetically:

"If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music he hears , however measured or far away."


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