Thursday, October 13, 2005

Ready for Vacation

I am so ready for this little vacation now. Last night was kinda fucked up. Well, it was more than kinda fucked up but I won't go into details here. I've already posted my rantings in a private post that maybe someday I'll unlock... but until then, I need to sort shit out before I say anything. I've had a few too many experiences lately where my reactions were found to be overreactions in the fullness of time. So, I'm keeping my inner dialog to myself until I work some shit out.

I was very bothered. Irritated, angry, upset, hurt. Lots of things. Didn't realize the extent of it until I went to bed. Didn't get any sleep last night. Had very fitful and fucked up dreams. Kept waking up every 45 minutes or so. It was one of those continuing dreams where each time I fell asleep it just continued on from where it left off. Although I don't remember the whole thing... I remember enough to know it was like some whacked-out science-fiction version of Spun with me and my friends (and someone I don't know) playing the roles. So, now I'm way over-tired here at work and hoping just to get through the day. I'm going to have to call Stacy and tell her I'll not be leaving until tomorrow since I didn't get any packing done or anything and I don't want to drive to somewhere I've never been in the middle of the night. I'll leave at first light tomorrow.

It will be good to see Stacy again. Hopefully she can help me sort out some of this shit in my head. She's always been my big sister and I need her advice. It's too bad it will only be for a couple of days.

I learned how to play "Children" and "Fable" on the piano yesterday. I find that working out the songs of those who influence me helps me to better express my own feelings through my own songs. Sure would like to get some good solid time on the music workstation soon. But that will be a while, I guess. Still hoping to get CDs burned and some Vinyl pressed before the WMC next year. Time is short though. Gotta get crackin'.

Anyway, just posting some thoughts and feelings as usual. Nothing major to report until I figure out the scrambled eggs in my head. More later.

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